February 2012
1 post
November 2011
2 posts
3 tags
3 tags
October 2011
4 posts
4 tags
WatchSkip to 1:15
5 tags
3 tags
September 2011
2 posts
3 tags
4 tags
WatchThe lazy river has never been lazier.
July 2011
1 post
June 2011
6 posts
2 tags
3 tags
3 tags
WatchScrew you sir, I am going home!
2 tags
3 tags
3 tags
WatchDon’t piss off Cartman
May 2011
1 post
4 tags
Remember when Cartman met Osama?
Good times.
April 2011
5 posts
3 tags
Watch“You know Mom, the least you could do is kiss me first because I like to be kissed before I get fucked!”
4 tags
Watch“I’ve got a better idea, why dont you go across the street and buy some condoms because we should at least be safe if you’re going to fuck me Mom.”
4 tags
Watch“No! You don’t ask me questions. You are a rabbit, I am a human, so if you don’t bring me what I want for Easter, I can fucking kill you!”
danceuntilyoud-i-e asked: http://fuckyeahcartman.tumblr.com/post/3890487002
Also, what episode is this?
Also, what episode is this?
danceuntilyoud-i-e asked: "Cartman: I'm like, a quarter-bi. My grandpa was bi, so that makes me quarter-bi."
What episode is this from?
What episode is this from?
March 2011
14 posts
3 tags
2 tags
2 tags
manbearblog:
2 tags
4 tags
2 tags
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3 tags
5 tags
Cartman: Guys, did you hear that? Butters doesn't know how you make semen come out of your body.
Kyle: How do you make semen come out?
Cartman: I don't know. I was hoping you guys did.
2 tags
Cartman: I'm half bi-sexual!
Mr. Garrison: Oh, stop it! You kids don't even know what you're talking about! Eric, you're not half-bi!
Cartman: I'm like, a quarter-bi. My grandpa was bi, so that makes me quarter-bi.
4 tags
Stan: You don't even know anything about Christianity!
Cartman: I know enough to exploit it.
4 tags
“I want to get down on my knees and start pleasing Jesus, I want to feel his...”
– Faith +1
5 tags
Stan: Dude, I wonder where Kyle is.
Cartman: Maybe he caught a disease and died. That'd be so awesome.
Stan: Dude that's not funny. You shouldn't joke about that.
Kenny: Yeah
Cartman: Who's joking? (Kyle enters)
Kyle: You guys, you guys, I have awesome news!
Cartman: You have AIDS?
2 tags
“Handle it? For two billion dollars I would handle my Grandpa’s balls, sir”
February 2011
12 posts
2 tags
Wendy: Stan? We're still Valentines, right?
Stan: Sure, Wendy, whatever.
Kyle: Hey! We should buy Ms. Ellen Valentine's Day presents.
Stan: Yeah! We'll go to the mall tonight!
Cartman: I'm gonna buy a vacuum cleaner. Chicks like vacuum cleaners.
4 tags
Kyle: Token sings?
Cartman: Of course he sings, he's black.
4 tags
WatchI want your Jew gold.
4 tags
“Remember Butters, you must get that future-telling device from the girls at all...”
4 tags
“This disease is called Gingervitis and it occurs because ginger kids have no...”
5 tags
“Make no mistake. Ginger kids are evil. You know who was ginger? Judas. And what...”
3 tags
3 tags
“And if there’s one thing I’ve learned it’s that the only way...”
3 tags
“Ok, our mission failed but we learned a lot. Primarily that girls do not have...”
3 tags
Cartman: It's a picture of me, and um...what appears to be, a penis...in my mouth.
Detective: You were sucking somebody's penis.
Cartman: No! No, I was not! I was asleep and this person just put their penis in my mouth--without me knowing--and took the picture.
Detective: I see.
Cartman: Yes. Now, it may appear in the picture, that I'm actually looking at the camera lens and smiling--with the penis in my mouth--and giving a thumbs up. But I assure you, I was fast asleep.
January 2011
15 posts
6 tags
Watch“Sometimes when things seem their darkest, you just need to try and stay HIV positive but if you wanna be so HIV negative all the time..”
2 tags
